000012 - fear of flying
been feeling really lethagic and unenthusiastic the last couple of days for some reason. i'd like to blame it on some sort of flu or cold going around but i don't think it's has anything to do with that as i don't think these feelings can be cured with simple medication. i feel like i've lost a lot of confidence in things; not sure of anything any more. if only we are born with instruction manuals, i'd be able to look up the "trouble shooting" section... "ctrl+alt+delete" to restart? what the--?!
perhaps my warranty has expired and it needs to be renewed...
from what i can only guess, i found out the other day that she's really happy and in love at the moment. as much as i'd like to be selfish and wish that it could be me & her that are happy together, i know loving someone doesn't necessarily mean you have to be with them, it's the knowledge that that person is happy, is all that matters.
went to a jazz club called the night cat on friday night and caught up with debs, rads, nals, nuwan, shaz, prasanna and marlon. never really been to a jazz club before and i don't think the band was exactly playing jazz... it was more like ambience funk / jazz type of music. it was alright. nice to see some of the gang, though rav & jacqs, and minh were no show...
she had her hair tied up today but just as cute and pretty as her usual self. i was happy just to see her but once again i couldn't find any opportunities to say anything to her. we exchanged glances and smiles as usual but that was all. i really wish it could be more and i could get to know her better but recent experiences have really deterred me into having any high expectations.
i have a fear of flying because i'm hate the falling part. it hurts so much to pick myself up every time again and again. i wish i could fly higher and longer but it seems i am better suited on the ground than flying. others make it look so easy flying up there in the sky, i wish i could be up there... i guess if it's meant to be it'll happen eventually...
anyway, finished colouring the cover today and just had some yummy dumplings tonight. about to head off to JB's house-warming party. should be interesting as his new digs has a terrace. too bad the weather is a bit crappy at the moment though or we all could be outside.
if i get home and have an early night, i'm going to try and run my legs off tomorrow morning. i really need the exercise and sweat as much as i can!
perhaps my warranty has expired and it needs to be renewed...
from what i can only guess, i found out the other day that she's really happy and in love at the moment. as much as i'd like to be selfish and wish that it could be me & her that are happy together, i know loving someone doesn't necessarily mean you have to be with them, it's the knowledge that that person is happy, is all that matters.
went to a jazz club called the night cat on friday night and caught up with debs, rads, nals, nuwan, shaz, prasanna and marlon. never really been to a jazz club before and i don't think the band was exactly playing jazz... it was more like ambience funk / jazz type of music. it was alright. nice to see some of the gang, though rav & jacqs, and minh were no show...
she had her hair tied up today but just as cute and pretty as her usual self. i was happy just to see her but once again i couldn't find any opportunities to say anything to her. we exchanged glances and smiles as usual but that was all. i really wish it could be more and i could get to know her better but recent experiences have really deterred me into having any high expectations.
i have a fear of flying because i'm hate the falling part. it hurts so much to pick myself up every time again and again. i wish i could fly higher and longer but it seems i am better suited on the ground than flying. others make it look so easy flying up there in the sky, i wish i could be up there... i guess if it's meant to be it'll happen eventually...
anyway, finished colouring the cover today and just had some yummy dumplings tonight. about to head off to JB's house-warming party. should be interesting as his new digs has a terrace. too bad the weather is a bit crappy at the moment though or we all could be outside.
if i get home and have an early night, i'm going to try and run my legs off tomorrow morning. i really need the exercise and sweat as much as i can!
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